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Inner Game

7 (More) Things Mentally Strong Investors Don’t Do

brainOK, so recently I shared what I feel is one of the single biggest reasons why some real estate investors enjoy heaps of success (1% high achievers) while others only marginally or not at all (99% low achievers). My submission is that it has very little to do with tactical knowledge, experience, opportunity or being in the right place at the right time – it’s a matter of mental strength.

Said another way, the single biggest difference between the awesomely successful and the rest is your “inner game” – it’s your mindset.  I also shared 7 key things that mentally strong real estate investors do not do, such as:

  1. They don’t waste time feeling sorry for themselves.
  2. They don’t give away their power.
  3. They don’t shy away from change.
  4. They don’t waste their energy on things they can’t control.
  5. They don’t worry about pleasing everyone.
  6. They don’t worry about taking calculated risks.
  7. They don’t dwell on the past.

Here’s the full lesson if you missed it…

Today I’d like to continue the conversation by challenging you with yet another 7 things mentally strong investors don’t do – and this list is just as important as the last. Read through it and see if you can find yourself somewhere inside.

So here goes…

8. They don’t make the same mistakes over and over.

That’s a popular definition of insanity, right? Doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting a different result. The mentally strong aren’t insane. I can promise you with 100% certainty that every single mentally strong and successful investor you’ve ever put on a pedestal up to now, has gone through the wringer multiple times in their businesses, and some of their mistakes have been big, honking losses. But mentally strong people understand what it means to fail forward – to make mistakes, learn from them, extract all the value you can, then adjust accordingly for the next time.

A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them, and strong enough to correct them. – John C. Maxwell

The successful man will profit from his mistakes and try again in a different way. – Dale Carnegie

jealousy9. They don’t resent other people’s success.

No one likes a jealous cry-baby. There will always be people who made it bigger than you, did a more profitable deal than you, made more money than you last year, got ahead of a new trend before you, or whatever. And some people just seem to have the gold touch, right? Mentally strong people aren’t envious, and know how to celebrate other people’s success. They’re also paying close attention, watching and learning how to respectfully stand on the shoulders of those around them who are enjoying more success.

Bitterness and resentment only hurt one person, and it's not the person you're resenting. – Alana Stewart

Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die. – Carrie Fisher

10. They don’t give up after the first failure.

Every single failure is a chance to improve. No toddler stops trying to walk after falling down the first time, and no mentally strong person ever stops moving forward after falling down the first time either. I’ve said it already – mentally strong investors don’t take failure to heart, but see it as welcome feedback, and the opportunity to correct course and choose a better path next time. They live and learn.

I can accept failure, everyone fails at something. But I can't accept not trying. – Michael Jordan

Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement. – C. S. Lewis

11. They don’t try to tackle the world all by their lonesome.

It seem easy and logical at first to go it alone – to be the maverick real estate investor, the self-made man who can carve out your own path from the granite of your raw determination, passion and work ethic. To do it all yourself, so you know it’s done right, and maintain full control over your own ship with no one to answer to but yourself.

But the fact is, that’s now how true businesses are built, it’s entirely unscalable, and a nearly sure-fire recipe for eventual burnout. In fact, most investors who operate in this way end up wondering how the promised “freedom” of the real estate dream turned into the nightmare of a self-made job that’s much harder and more demanding than whatever “J.O.B.” they left behind.

Mentally strong investors understand the value of assembling a team and leveraging them well. They understand and embrace the idea that ultimately (and ideally as soon as possible) they’ll need to let others help carry them into new places they’d never really be able to accomplish as a “solopreneur” investor.

Teamwork is so important that it is virtually impossible for you to reach the heights of your capabilities or make the money that you want without becoming very good at it. – Brian Tracy

Teamwork is the fuel that allows common people to attain uncommon results; teamwork divides the task and doubles the success. – Unknown

solitude12. They don’t fear alone time.

Even when mentally strong people can be very outgoing and socially comfortable, they also appreciate the value of being alone sometimes. Mentally strong people understand the subtle but profound difference between loneliness and solitude. They can not only enjoy their own company, but find “alone time” to be an excellent opportunity to introspect, create vision, plan and be exceptionally productive.

I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity. – Albert Einstein

The best thinking has been done in solitude. The worst has been done in turmoil. – Thomas A. Edison

13. They don’t feel the world owes them anything.

Said another way, mentally strong people don’t have an entitlement mentality. The fervent, misguided sense of entitlement we see rampant today is stunning. But the words “I deserve” rarely, if ever, come from the mentally strong person’s lips. Even when things seem unexpectedly unfair, they land in a place of believing that they are ultimately responsible for the reality and circumstances around them, and the only human being they can look to for change is themselves.

Dependence begets subservience and venality, suffocates the germ of virtue, and prepares fit tools for the designs of ambition – Thomas Jefferson

Beware: It is a quick transition from a nourishing sense of gratitude to a poisonous sense of entitlement. – Steve Maraboli

14. They don’t always expect immediate results.

We may live in a fast food nation, with instant gratification offered to us at every turn and in every possible way. But mentally strong people aren’t focused so much on immediate results as they are taking immediate action.

Whether it’s a workout plan, a nutritional regimen, or launching a whole new business, mentally strong people are in it for the long haul. They appreciate immediate results when they occur, but understand that it’s not the measure of ultimate success or lack thereof. They understand that real change usually takes steady investments of time and effort, and they are willing to make these investments while keeping their eye squarely on the ball.

Patience, persistence and perspiration make an unbeatable combination for success. – Napoleon Hill

Have patience. All things are difficult before they become easy. – Saadi

So there ya go: Seven…and then another seven (that’s fourteen for you kids playing at home) things you should not be doing if you want to enjoy the rich bounty available to the mentally strong. And trust me, you do.

So where are you in these lists? Which of these hits you where it stings a little? Please leave some candid thoughts in the feedback area below – I’d love to hear from you.


Do It To It! Immediate Action Steps

Read the first 7 “don’ts” in the list, if you haven’t already.

Take every mistake, every error in judgment, and every loss as an explicit opportunity for learning and growth – and make sure it happens.

Don’t resent other people’s success or be threatened by it. Instead celebrate them and learn from what they did right.

When you fail, don’t give up. Learn from it and keep moving forward.

Stop believing you can do it all on your own. Build an awesome team to support you and take you places you’d never get on your own, and become a student of learning how to lead them well.

Learn the discipline of solitude, and use it to wisely introspect, create vision, plan and be exceptionally productive.

Don’t have an entitlement mentality – look to yourself for change rather than expecting it from others.

Don’t always demand immediate results in order to measure whether something is successful or worthwhile.

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