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Inner Game

What Is Success? You Tell Me

Hey Moguls, if you’ve been hangin’ around our community for a while, you may know that one of our go-to thought leaders for motivation, inspiration and chiseling out a better version of ourselves around here is muscle prodigy Jaret Grossman.

We’ve published two fantastic videos from him in the past, one is about being fearless and another is on the concept of good vs. great. Check them out!

In today’s awesome video lesson Jaret throws out the stereotypical ideas of success and influence and guides us on how to choose our own destiny. Do you have people coming at you from every direction telling you what you should be doing or what success really looks like and how to achieve it?

Squash that noise.

Get inspiration from people who lead by example… not those who tell us what to do but those who show us what to do. Then, focus on what you truly feel is your calling – not what people think you should be doing or what’s expected of you.

Look, folks, this is a good one. Get ready to dig in…

By the way, here’s a helpful reminder about Jaret Grossman – a wildly successful bodybuilder and thought-leader within the fitness industry – which speaks directly to the heart of greatness and describes what it is like to fight against mediocrity every single day.

Jaret’s message hits right at the definition of success…

{Mogul Elite: Download a transcript and MP3 of this lesson in the Power Pack tools for this lesson.}

So we've all been brainwashed by the media, by our peers, by our parents, by our mentors, teachers – to achieve this thing called "Success." No one ever defines success for us. But you can look up the definition of it in a dictionary that would do large injustice to you. Success is really a random, arbitrary thing if you think about words. 

What are words? They’re meanings of association. They're just ideas, thoughts that we learn to attach to a concept that's different in everybody's eyes. If you're going to achieve something, you must have a firm grasp of what exactly that is. 

So what is success? 

That's the first step.  So let me give you my definition.  Success is not money, it is not clothes, it is not cars, and it is not materialistic items.  Those are simply rewards of habits of successful people.  Success is a magnitude of the beneficial footprint that you leave on society.  How many people do you have an effect on and what type of impact do you have? 

nunTo a man who makes a lot of money but neglects his children or neglects his family, who neglects his peers, has a very limited impact on especially those who mattered most.  So his success level is far diminished from what he could be.  It’s far diminished from someone who has achieved a lot but had a major impact in forming their children, in shaping their peers, in shaping their spouse.  So success is really the idea of the magnitude of your affect, how large it is and the type of affect.  How positive it is. 

So why do we look up to people?  We look up to certain people who have achieved a certain realm and usually it’s in a profession that's a mere focus of what you have your eyes on. 

So if you like sports, you view athletes as being successful.  The pinnacle of success and their concepts. Your idea is relative to you. Am I offering to you?

To open your eyes up to what success is in your realm, by looking inward, not outward.  From the biases of the media, from your parents, from your peers, from your teachers – we're all trying to shape you in a way to living, their definitions, their perspectives. 

What they intend their life to have looked like as this crystal staircase as if they were molding you to live in their shoes.  You are young and have a future and they are really caught up in their way.  So they think that that time has passed… that they no longer have the ability, the resources to be able to achieve that level.  So they try to influence you into their way.  Whether that's to force you to go to certain education rounds… 

Open your eyes to what you want, to what you are to achieve, to establish where you are right now and to create a plan of action to lead you in that direction of success.  If you're good at something, you don't need people to tell you that you're good at it.  It just emanates off as energy, this feeling that we are inspired by – we’re inspired by people who lead by example, not who tell us what to do but rather show us that. 

How do you get a horse to drink water?  You don't take the horse’s head and shove it down there, right?  You drink, the horse sees how vibrant and healthy you are and how you're not thirsty anymore so it drinks, because it wants to follow. 

You can take or leave my definition for how you want it.  That's the point.  The idea is for you to create your own definition.  For you to draw up your own experience.  Take advice that you hear and internalize it within.  Look within yourself.  So you might find this useful.  So adopt it towards your own. 

mjThe reason why my definition is the way it is, is because of my experiences.  So I gauge society.  I look at it.  I try to see who society idolizes, who we glorify – we as people.

Michael Jordan, for instance.  People think he's successful.  Oprah, successful.  Bill Gates.  When you look at it in one layer, it’s that they're the best in their profession.  That's in a particular craft. 

But when you look at it really deep and you understand why are they successful… it’s not because they have money or power.  They are a lot of people who have money and power who you never heard of.  You may not think they're successful.  They have millions of people drawn to them based on this impact.  Emanating energy.  That "Wow!  She did this!  She created this empire out of nothing.  She is an inspiration.  She could it, I can do it.  With hard work and focus and consistency and pouring my heart and soul into something that I can really look up to her in a way, because she's speaking out to me."  That's success… how beneficial is that effect on you. 

But it starts with your inner circle.  A dead-beat father is a success in my eyes no matter how much wealth he accumulates.  There was not a day that goes by in that man's life that he doesn't really reflect and think and it eats at his soul that he wasn't there for his child. 

Your inner circle is the most important. 

Then you grow and expand from there.  So the idea is for you to create your own experience in terms of you looking internally within.  So when your parents give you advice and tell you paths to lead down, roads to go down, when your peers are influencing you… let me leave it like this –your parents and mentors and teachers are older, are wiser, regardless of what you think that they may not understand you.  They have a lot more experience under their belt. 

parentsFor instance if you're 20 years old and your parents are 40, they have double the life that you have in terms of living, experiencing things that you've never experienced.  They were your age once.  They had urges like you did.  So they understand that hard work is important.  But it’s important to focus that hard work on where your heart is telling you to go.  That's the important part, which your parents really do not know unless you've had deep conversations and communicated with them back and forth on this.  But if you felt a lack of expression or your parents weren't apt to listening to you in terms of your heart, then there's going to be a disconnect there.

So my offering to you is this.  Take certain people's values over others.  Internalize it.  You always look within yourself, within your heart, within your soul about what that wants. 

If you want to be a doctor and you really visualize that, that's where you want to be.  You bet your bottom, you need to go to medical school to get that degree.  But there are certain things that maybe you do want, you do want to be and you envision yourself as this business owner.  You have to really look and analyze: "Is this education, this degree, is it going to be important to my goals and my happiness?" 

Now sometimes you have to go through pain to become who you want to be.  You have to go through pain to get there.  But there's good pain and there's bad pain.  There's bad pain that eats at your soul if that's not what you wanted.  It’s good pain if you're going to get a reward from it that you want. 

That's the important distinguishing factor that you have to have.  So you always need to analyze it as to who you want to be.  Where you are right now and what path you have to take to get there. 


Do It To It! Immediate Action Steps

Review Your Inbox – Are there ways to clean it up?  Are you overwhelmed by the number of messages you receive?  Look at ways to cut down, organize and clean up your inbox to make it clutter free.

Think Productivity – Besides email, look at your business as a whole.  What are you wasting time on?  What are you doing that is driving your results.  Do more of the latter.  Get rid of the former.

Communicate Better – Communication is key when you are managing a real estate business.  Figure out if you are doing it well, and fix any problems.

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